Privileges you earn when you become a consultant

A consultant is the most senior doctor on a medical or surgical team (also known as the 'attending' on Grey's Anatomy for those who need a more contemporary reference). First and foremost, consultants are people. Therefore, there will be good and bad, nice and not so nice consultants just as there are people. But there are some things that just come with the title. They are living the dream.

1. You don't have to use punctuation in your emails

Come on, we've all had that experience where you spend an hour trying to word a really important email in exactly the right way. You try to keep it succinct but not abrupt, have a tone that is keen but not does not make you look like a kiss-up and most of all, you check and re-check your grammar and spelling. Only to receive the reply a week later:

Hi ruth

Yes thats fine

BW (i.e. best wishes)

TRM (i.e. consultant's initials)

Seriously? You've obviously typed that on your iPhone walking into the hospital from your car.

2. You are not expected to remember anyone's name, but everyone should know yours

Classic. You join the ward round 2 mins late- after all the necessary introductions. So no-one knows who you are and you don't know who anyone else is. Is that the intern or the registrar standing next to you? Panic. You introduce yourself to the consultant. He obviously doesn't catch your name and doesn't bother telling you his. Next dilemma: Do you ask him his name? Is that impertinence? I am just a lowly medical student.... It probably doesn't matter much because he'll walk straight past you in the corridor the day after anyway.

3. You don't need to carry anything with you anywhere

So the consultant does not know your name. But that does not stop him asking you to borrow your stethoscope on a RESPIRATORY ward round. Obviously you must oblige. Then when he is finished listening to the patient's chest and walks away absent mindedly, you pick up the notes, redress the patient, pull the curtains open and also let him borrow your pen. By this time, he's already forgotten the stethoscope isn't his. Follow him like a hawk.

4. You are excused for being up to 20 mins late to almost anything

Anyone who has had teaching arranged with a consultant knows that teaching arranged for 10am may not actually start until 10.30am or may not happen at all. But it's fine. They were probably busy cutting someone's chest open.

5. You get paid to work a full day but you can spend most of it in your office

Now this is not entirely true. And makes all consultants sound lazy. But whereas junior staff have to do paperwork stood in the middle of a busy ward, a consultant can retire to their comfy swivel chair in a quiet office- sometimes complete with personal coffee maker. The rest of us swap spit on half-washed coffee mugs while fighting over the last free computer.

We've got a lot to look forward to!